Today's line I didn't write that I wished I had written.
Only in America could we become engaged in a civil war fighting about statues and flags from the last civil war.
At the end of the week, I guest hosted on talk radio. The hot topic du jour was the aforementioned fighting about the effort to have Confederate monuments removed versus having them stay right where they are. Inevitably included, of course, were the snappy accessories that come with every monumental discussion, the flag and/or bumper sticker and/or lapel pins, etc bearing bearing that most ubiquitous of Southern symbolism, the Stars and Bars.
The callers and conversation fell upon predictable lines, lines that, frankly, aren't all that uncommon when it comes to most anything that gets discussed, term used loosely if not sardonically, on talk radio these days.
Passionately in favor, passionately opposed or what's the big deal. And we'll be right back after the break
Toward the end of the discussion, as I prepared to steer the show off in another direction, if only because there's only so much passionately in favor, passionately opposed or what's the big deal that any one topic can stand before the talk show goes from an interesting splashing around the pool of public opinion to the sensation you have when water is dripping on your forehead, I got a call from a gentleman who, if I had asked him, which I didn't, could not have done a better job of putting a powerful and perfect period at the end of the sentence.
"...as a black man", he said, "....I can only tell you that what most white people don't understand is that when I see someone drive past me with a Confederate flag or sticker, or I go past the house where there is a Confederate flag or banner or sticker, I fear that person doesn't see me as a person… They see me as a problem… A problem that needs to be remedied…"
Later in the day, while catching up with blog sites and programs and social media posts, I offered the anecdote of that call and I added "I've never had a call on talk radio more profound than that."
For the next few hours, a number of people emojied their "like" of the sharing. And then...
A colleague from years gone by posted a comment, a friend who I have always considered a reasonable man, loving family man and oft professed Christian, as well as being mostly non-political in his postings in a time when resisting that temptation becomes more difficult with each passing moment.
His comment, frankly, surprised me given my perception of him.
"...Why is it the guy with the flag or banner's fault how the elderly black man perceives how the flag guy feels about him?..."
First, wow.
Second, the word "fault" rang my bell because there wasn't a mention of that word in any of my sharing and his use of it struck me as unnecessarily defensive.
Third, another articulate friend replied almost immediately to his comment.
"Really?" she offered.
I let it go, more accurately, I took a step back and gave it some thought. This morning I posted the following response that his original response.
"....it should be enough that an old man, lucid, articulate and reasonable, who has lived life as a black in this country for what I estimate to be sixty plus years, feels like he is perceived as a "problem that needs to be remedied", but, it's not, is it?
instead, it's more important that the person who is either obtuse or indifferent to the fact that these monuments and flags and bumper stickers conjure up uncertainties and fears that those of us who will never have an inkling of what it has been like to grow up black in this country can disregard those uncertainties and fears because they simply have "the right" to plant or fly or sticker whatever they want whenever they damn well want.
this black man, obviously, has no way of knowing for sure, whether the Stars and Bars connoisseur is a vitriolic white supremacist with a seething desire to see all blacks swinging from the neighborhood oak tree or a kind, caring, loving everyday good guy who simply feels an affectionate pride in his (or her) Southern heritage.
just as none of us, regardless of our color, know, for sure, whether that guy toting the AR15 on his back through the local Wal Mart is a careful and cautious citizen simply exercising his right to openly carry the weapon in public or a psycho about to open fire at any given moment.
it's not about freedom...it's about courtesy...and consideration.
and the thousands of posts/discussion/arguments etc that banter and bicker back and forth about the "real" meaning of the flag or the "facts" about slavery or the "erasure of history", ad nauseum, distract from and disregard a fairly simple and irrefutable reality.
regardless of what the flag and the stickers and, to a lesser extent, the monuments authentically or empirically historically represent, they are, in fact, used and abused,, by extremists and supremacists and vitriolic racists, as symbols of their defiance, their hatred and resentment and as not so veiled threats of their potentially acting upon those feelings of defiance and hatred and resentment.
meanwhile, the knee jerk, go-to rebuttal goes something like this..."well, today, it's the Stars and Bars....and tomorrow, it's gonna be the Alaska state flag, cause that Big Dipper promotes astronomy and all those other Godless sciences....or the Wyoming state flag because people don't want the poor buffaloes mistreated...." (examples all, obviously, exaggerated to underscore the idiocy involved in all of this) One of the more erudite among us actually posted a meme that showed the Iwo Jima monument with some inane caption about "coming next."
all of this nonsense to be filed under the current top of the charts hit "false equivalency" because, first, it's nonsense and second, neither the Alaska flag nor the Wyoming flag or the Iwo Jima monument or even that John 3:16 banner than has become a staple of televised football are used, overtly and bluntly, as symbols of defiance, hatred, resentment and not so veiled threats of the potential acting upon those feelings.
it should be enough that a monument or a flag or a bumper sticker puts fear into a mind or heart or pit of a stomach.
it should be enough that that particular fear is neither imaginary nor "sno-flaky" and is, in fact, reasonable, even understandable, given the what and why and how of where it's coming from.
it should be enough that my neighbor and fellow citizen has experienced terrible things in his life that I will never understand, let alone experience, in my own and a statue, or a flag, or a bumper sticker causes him to feel less a part of our neighborhood than he deserves to feel.
it should be enough that I have the opportunity to put my money where my mouth is when it comes to proselytizing Scriptural values and doing what I can to ease a little suffering, prevent a little pain, take away a little fear....when all I have to do is put my statue on my own mantle, hang my flag in my own rec room and put my sticker on the refrigerator door. and leave them at that.
and it should be enough that an old man , lucid, articulate and reasonable, who has lived life as a black in this country for sixty years feels like he is perceived as a "problem that needs to be remedied"
but it's not enough.
is it?..."
In the course of writing this piece, I, of course, had to re-read that response a time or two.
Here's the thing.
Somehow, I feel like it's not going to be enough.
Is it?
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