What's A Few Loose Screws As Long As The Magazine Is Secure..."

Here's the only absolutely sure thing about any discussion of guns in this country.

At some point, discussion of guns simply becomes too exhausting to continue.

It's a lot like divorce.

If you're the one divorcing, then you know how the argument or arguments get to the point where it's an exercise in futility to continue. Every time you say up , they say down, every time they say white, you say black, every time either one of you says anything, the other one of you says the other thing and it goes back and forth and back and forth and back and forth....until you simply just don't fucking care anymore.

And if you're the one growing up in the midst of a divorce, you simply, and much more quickly, get to the point where you simply want mommy and daddy to shut the fuck up and stop fighting.

The key difference, of course, is that when the dust settles on the bickering, there are no school kids lying dead on cold tile floors in hallways and classrooms. No blood slowly trickling under desks and lockers. No sounds of screams and sirens and weeping and moaning in a space where the only sounds obvious should be the ringing of bells signaling the end of class or a chorus of voices talking about homework or after school events or what's for lunch or teenage love affairs in a mixture of sound that almost reminds one of a symphony warming up before a concert. No particular melody obvious to the naked ear, a cacophony that seemingly makes no sense at all, yet, is interesting, even comforting.

In recent weeks, both in print, here on this podcast and on air as I've guest hosted on talk radio, I've quoted, a number of times and in a number of contexts, a line of dialogue cleverly delivered by the late John Mahoney, who played Martin Crane, the down to earth dad of Niles and Frasier Crane in the popular sitcom "Frasier". At some point or another, in one of Frasier's trademark erudite, verbose rants about this social injustice or that etiquette faux pas, Marty Crane, with the wisdom of the ages, lovingly, but almost wearily offers to his son, "life isn't complicated, Frasier...you just make it that way."

For all of the emotional, psychological, physiological, rhetorical, political, sociological, philosophical, even spiritual shades of gray that find their way into the swirl of 2nd Amendment soup, Marty Crane's observation seems both trenchant and on target. So to speak.

The issue of guns in this country isn't complicated. Americans just make it that way.

Because the issue of guns in this country is the mother of all things guaranteed to send mommy and daddy into full blown bitch and bicker, fuck me, no, fuck you, Katy, bar the door back and forth and back and forth and back and forth and back...and forth....until exhaustion arrives, almost like a rescuer. Ending the circular madness of the confrontation.

But ending only the madness of the confrontation. Not the madness itself.

The first dictionary I consulted offered up three definitions of the word madness.

A state of frenzied or chaotic activity.

Extremely foolish behavior.

The state of being mentally ill, especially severely.

And as regards the madness America sloppily, even embarrassingly tries to disguise as "debate" about the right to bear arms?

Check, check and check on those three definitions.

Frenzied or chaotic activity?

Log on to any social media site. Turn on any news station. Tune in, call in, join in the galactic sized gathering of Rhodes Scholars, legal and constitutional experts and love it or leave it patriotic defenders of the red, white and blue that make up talk radio these days.

We got yer frenzied or chaotic activity.

Extremely foolish behavior?

Uh, yeah. Again, log on, turn on, tune in.

"I can have any goddamn gun I want, as many goddamn guns as I want, any and every goddamn time I want because the goddamn 2nd Amendment says so........"

"...alrighty, then. Let's go to our next caller."

 And then, there's that little matter of the state of being mentally ill, especially severely.

17 dead kids lying on the cold tile floors of hallways and classrooms in Parkland, Florida. Shot to death by a teenager who got the key to daddy's obviously useless gun safe and pulled out the trusty AR-15 to take out his misery and frustration on 17 dead kids lying on the cold tile.....

...well, you get the idea.

Stop me if you've heard this one before.

It's not a gun issue. It's a mental health issue.

You know what?

Goddamn right it's a mental health issue.

How crazy do you have to be to think that your "right" to have access to or own whatever weapon you want, as many as you want, whenever you want is more important, EVER, for a single goddamn second that the "right" of a kid to go to school and not end up lying dead on the cold tile floor of a hallway or classroom?

Goddamn right it's a mental health issue.

How crazy do you have to be to not only say, but actually believe, mindlessly moronic things like "well, some guy in China knifed 33 people to death so let's ban knives, too. In fact, I could stab you with a salad fork, so let's ban salad forks too." Love of God, man, do you actually hear yourself when you say staggeringly stupid shit like that?

And if one more person even begins the sentence that starts with "drunk drivers" and ends with "let's ban cars", swear to God, I'm coming after you and your family with a salad fork.

Help me to help you. What is it you don't get about how one has nothing to do with the other? That saying staggeringly stupid shit like "well, if they didn't have a gun, they'd just use a knife" is exactly the same thing as saying "well, if he didn't beat his wife with a baseball bat, he's just beat his wife with his fists" instead of saying "for the ever loving love of Christ, we have got to do whatever it takes....whatever it takes......to keep this guy from beating his wife."

How crazy do you have to be not to see that?

Goddamn right it's a mental health issue.

How crazy do you have to be to be saying anything...anything....other than "what can I do, how I can I help, what's reasonable and practical and, simply, do-able to, at the very least, lessen the chances that even one more kid will end up dead on the cold tile floor of a hallway or classroom, blood slowly trickling under desks and lockers...the sounds of screams and sirens and weeping and moaning in a space where the only sounds obvious should be the ringing of bells signaling the end of class or a chorus of voices talking about homework or after school events or what's for lunch or teenage love affairs...?"

All kinds of mental illness in life, you know.

Here's a top ten list compiled by mental health professionals.

1) Major Depressive Disorder (include dysthymia, seasonal affective disorders)
2) Generalized Anxiety/Panic disorder (include other anxiety disorders such as social anxiety)
3) Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder
4) Bipolar disorder (include cyclothymia and bipolar I and II
5) Schizophrenia and Schizoaffective disorders
6) Dissociation and Multiple Personality disorders
7) Other personality disorders such as Borderline Personality
8) ADD/ADHD
9) Insomnia
10) Addiction
11) Eating Disorders (include Anorexia, Bulimia, and not otherwise specified)
12) Post Traumatic Stress Disorder
13) Dementia
14) Autism


Let's take a quick look at those through the red, white and blue colored glasses of those laser focused loyal to the 2nd Amendment patriots.

Major depressive disorder....what? I can't have as many of whatever whenever I want? bummer, man...and, oh, yeah, no fucking way, snowflake.

Generalized anxiety...I gotta have guns...I gotta have more guns....I gotta have all guns....they're gonna take my guns....they're gonna keep me from having guns, more guns, all guns.....this is so nerve wracking....and, oh, yeah, no fucking way, snowflake.

Obsessive-compulsive disorder...gotta have, gotta have more, gotta have all....

Bi polar disorder....guns make me feel ten feet tall, twelve inches long and eight miles high....the thought of no guns makes me feel like life isn't worth living...

Schizophrenia...I keep hearing voices....telling me they're coming to take my guns....oh...wait....I was watching Will and Grace....who put on Fox News?

Multiple personality disorders...having all these guns makes me feel like Jesse James and Lucas McCain and Patton and Leroy Jethro Gibbs and ...and.....

ADD/ADHD...so, you're saying that we can still own guns and, at the same time, make it less likely that kids will be shot to de....wait.....is that Hannity?.....make it less likely that kids will be....wait?....is that an ATF truck pulling up outside?

Insomnia....they're going to take my guns, can't sleep, they're going to take my guns, can't sleep...

PTSD...I still get all clammy and shaky when I think how my dad gave me that BB gun but made me give up the AR-15....

Dementia....I'm crazy about guns.....guns are my friend.....guns will protect me and my family, uh, yeah, that, too, sure....but it's just good to have them....they make me feel manly....and safe....and....wait...what is that? is that firecrackers?........wait.....is there a fire....where are those sirens going......where is that weeping sound coming from................why.........are things......so quiet all of a sudden.

Yeah.

It's not a gun issue.

It's a mental health issue.

Goddamn right it is.

Can't Stand Much More Of America Being Made Great Again

Let's see…a 71 year old white man from Selma, Alabama named Jefferson Beauregard Sessions seems to imply, in a speech, that law enforcement should be primarily white and there's shock and disbelief. Up next: a nation stunned as a leopard reveals its spots..

Coal workers still not being provided the jobs that were promised, take heart.... starting to look like each and every one of you will have a shot at being either WH Chief of Staff or director of the FBI sooner or later......

#whatthehellmaybeevenfirstlady

…interesting insight in a JFK bio I'm going through researching another book.....

".... Kennedy understood that it was the people in a country that mattered. Governments come and go, but the people of a country are its heart and soul and mind and showing them dignity and respect and concern makes all the difference when it comes to being respected in return. It was that wisdom that made him globally appreciated and respected and accounts for the massive outpouring of both affection and grief that occurred all over the world when he was assassinated."

Donald could benefit from taking a few minutes to read this particular bio......you know, if he ever read anything......or, you know, if he could actually read......

66 programs to be eliminated in the proposed Trump budget...trimming waste is one thing...arbitrarily shutting down beneficial programs out of pettiness and/or spite is another....and....since Trump doesn't read anything that's not on a teleprompter or the Fox News Chiron, one wonders who put this list together.....President Bannon or President Kelly...wait, President Kushner.....no.....President Kellyanne.......pick a prez, any prez.....

Trump's budget includes a plan for privatizing the space station...good news is that shuttle flights will resume...it will take five, at least, to haul the giant T R U M P letters up there for the install....

Today's Fun American Street Riddle....

...how do you get to the high road via Pennsylvania Ave?

...bwahahaha.... trick question......there's no high road anywhere near Pennsylvania Ave.

The plan is to get rid of food stamps and replace it with food “kits”…once again....a system designed by geniuses...being "improved" by idiots......the point, that there are abuses of the food stamp program, is valid....

instead of closing loopholes and increasing accountability via high tech methods currently available, though, the "solution" is to

1) deny those with a genuine need, as in punishing the innocent because it's easier (and less profitable) than shutting off the guilty.....

2) ask people to rely on a delivery system created and to be coordinated by an administration that is both globally known and admired for its efficiency..#sarcasm .what about misshipments? what about delayed shipments? what about lost shipments? what about spoiled food? what about a returns policy..(Ivanka, Jared and Tweedle Eric and Tweedle Junior have to do six months, minimum, on the customer service hotline) ...oh, yeah, this is marvelous....what could possibly go wrong? #sarcasm

3) guarantee that every person involved in the assembly and distribution of these "kits" will make a fortune.....starting with the corner grocer whose first new location is 1600 Pennsylvania Ave...#trumpsteaksineverykitbetthefarm

4) dick around and spend God knows how much for days, weeks or months trying to get a program doomed to fail from the get go up and running that has less of a chance of lifting off than a space shuttle filled with contestants from The Biggest Loser.

5) NEW RULE: any new program or adjustment to an existing program that affects people's material or physical needs must be "beta tested" for 90 days by, at least, ten members of each party in the Senate, the House of Reps and the corner grocer at 1600 Pennsylvania Ave.

yo, Herman....and your buddy, there......you guys think the women's marches filled the streets with pissed off people? wait till you get a load of tens of thousands of hungry people.......

stop pandering to the "base".
fix the goddamn existing system.

And now…Parkland, Florida…

OBVIOUS SOLUTION #54....insist that your Congressperson and Senator vote to make the NRA a Federal Agency......Trump will cut off funding and dismantle the damn thing in 48 hours or less.....

…if it was 17 dead bodies lying on the floor of the United States Senate or the House of Representatives, the "Comprehensive Legislation to Insure Protection" (C.L.I.P) would be created, presented, voted on, passed and on Trump's desk for signature by EOB today......

PARTING THOUGHT…Those who immediately respond that guns are not the problem in this country are absolutely correct…

The problem in this country is the attitude about guns…

All you want as many as you want whenever you want for whatever you want…

That selfishness, not the gun, is what is killing our children…

Continue that selfishness.

Protect the children.

Pick one.

You can’t have both.

Yes, There's Black And There's White...But I'll Be The One Telling You Which One Is Which...

Too many of the major news outlets and almost all talk radio is, at best, missing a valuable opportunity and, at worst, just adding fuel to an already raging fire

Little thing called “preaching to the choir”.

Nobody is always right or always wrong about everything all the time. Not the left. And not the right. And not the moderates, Libertarians, Rotarians, Vegetarians, or magna cum laude graduates of Hogwarts…… And without the informed, reasonable, articulate dissenting opinion, this country would have driven off the cliff and exploded into a billion fiery pieces decades and decades ago.

The only reason that hasn’t happened yet is we go through this yank to the left yank to the right yank to the left yank to the right Benny Hill Driving School comedy routine on an every four or eight-year basis and because we back and forth we can’t quite MAKE it to the edge…but …guess what?

We don’t get anywhere, either…we just yank and bicker and bitch and argue and either weave around like idiots or we travel in circles.

First, there’s “confirmation bias”…the phenomenon that dictates our refusal to even hear, let alone consider, ANY opinion, point of view l let alone fact, that doesn’t merely back up whatever we believe or want to believe in the first place…..then, there’s arrogance…the attitude that, we’re America, fuck you…..what do you mean we need to improve….fuck you….what do you mean we aren’t perfect, fuck you…we’re America….….then, of course, pride…the garden variety that goes before the fall…..add selfishness, the character kink that says we want what we want as much as we want of whatever we want any and every damn time we want it because, fuck you, we’re America….and you know what? Those destructive and defeating parts of our humanness have been around since the Garden…….the only reason they’re suddenly more obvious than usual these days is the “flamboyance” of someone like Donald Trump who, set aside any and all policy disagreements we might have with him, has made rudeness and crudeness and arrogance and selfishness not only acceptable, but pretty much fashionable….Make America Great Again…..scratch just a little under that mantra and you’ll read the real message….fuck you, we’re America……

Earlier this week, I guest hosted on talk radio…. on the morning after the State of the Union speech, I opened both the phone lines and the can of worms that comes with any “so what are your thoughts” when it comes to any and all things Trump these days.  I personally sat out of the back and forth, offering no personal opinion, merely moderating or, more accurately, acting as the goalie…when the puck flew too close to the fire, I kicked it back into play…did it on purpose…so that I could concentrate on hearing and reading the texts that were also a part of the conversation….and with allowances for a few comments about “well, I liked the speech” or “he sounded good, hope he lives up to the promises”, most of what was said and what was heard on this very air was bashing the Democrats for not applauding, for wearing black, for having red hair and drooling and on and on and on…….

And don’t think for a second that the Republicans are always the bad guys….if Hillary had taken the oath in Jan and the GOP had given Hillary the symbolic finger last night, the phones would have been burning with Democrats up in arms about why their girl wasn’t being praised and adored and respected….and…and….it’s ENOUGH ALREADY…..a pox on both your houses….but better yet, how about a pox on neither house?

Even better yet, how about no damn poxes at all? How about you try to, at the very least, stop throwing out the good with the bath water and find something the party you oppose has to offer that isn’t demonic or Satanic and destined to take us all into the fiery depths of extinction….no matter which party you belong to and which party that party you oppose.

Because NOBODY is ALL WRONG OR ALL RIGHT ALL THE TIME……Now, if you can’t do that because you truly believe the other guys have nothing to offer but the fiery depths of extinction, then we can all just stop worrying….because if that’s true, we got bigger problems than we can every hope to overcome, so we may as well just kick back, enjoy the Super Bowl this weekend and hug our kids while we wait for the end to come.

And THAT’S what you should be hearing from most of the major news outlets and almost ALL of talk radio……. but you’re not…and you won’t…. because that’s not what preaching to the choir sounds like….

Real, honest, god given true leadership is really hard…because sometimes it means going against the grain…against the flow…against the current…it means knowing exactly what it is you want to hear and knowing that if I tell you that, you’re gonna love me and praise me and vote for me no matter what kind of a scum ball human being I might be…..but instead of telling you what you want to hear, inciting you and lowering the bar of behavior, I try instead to inspire you…..tricky business knowing the difference between being inspired and being incited……not a lot of people know how to tell…and NONE of us can really tell ALL the time whether it’s one or the other……

But when a news show host or a talk radio host tells you, yeah, those Democrats are a bunch of losers because they didn’t show Donald Trump the respect he deserves, that’s not trying to get you to see things from both sides and make an honest evaluation….that’s trying to stir the pot that’s already boilin’…so that you’ll feel like talk radio has your back, baby…..and it makes for good ratings….at least it makes for people who already feel that way to tune in…..but it’s not really doing much good or making things any better or even beginning to be a part of looking for solutions…..it’s just preaching to the choir…..and I’m pretty sure that not a lot is accomplished by getting people who are already in the pews all worked up about being in the pews…..when there’s so many people wandering around outside who might think at least a little about coming in and having a seat….if only someone would take the time and make the effort to inspire them…instead of inciting them.

But that’s what gets you elected to the Presidency now…. inciting the voters as opposed to inspiring them….and stirring hearts and minds has been harshly replaced with stirring up the shit pot of anger and resentment and hatred and bigotry….

TV news talk….and talk radio? Well they’re mostly just worm can opening and shit pot stirring and feeding the fire that already burns too hot…. flames so high that sometimes you think they might reach all the way to heaven….but then, you already know that don’t you….and my telling you all of this…is just preaching to the choir….