"Dodo Birds, 8 Track Tape and Truth---Name Three Things That Are Extinct"

Jumping off a bridge has become a way of life, these days.

And if you haven't done it personally, or know someone who has done it, you have certainly seen it happen.

Probably already today.

Last week, comedian/cable commentary host Bill Maher, in the midst of a conversation with his panelists regarding accountability, or, more accurately, the lack there of, in current American politics, offered a cut down to the bone observation that should be immediately printed on as many bumper stickers, T shirts, key chains and refrigerator magnets as humanly possible.

"Lying must be made punishable again."

He went on, for a moment or two, on the social phenomenon that has rendered facts, irrefutable truth about...well, about pretty much anything and/or everything, a non-entity. Or, at best, only one of a number of factors that might (emphasis on the word "might") be taken into consideration when determining an outcome, rendering a judgement or, simply, owning up to an action or behavior.

Put simply...what it is....is no longer automatically what it is. 

Historians, sociologists, psychologists, behaviorists and late night comedy writers will, for years to come, ponder, probe and postulate on the how and why when it comes to the demotion of the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth.

For now, the rest of us are left to deal with the "what". The rest of us, that is, that makes up those who still understand and accept the difference, no matter how subtle or nuanced, between opinion and fact, sentiment and fact, theory and fact and, most importantly, belief and fact. 

And, as with so many other kinks in the garden hose of humanity these days, eyes and ears, inevitably, if not first and foremostly, turn to the current inhabitant of the Oval Office.

Given, though, the slippery slope that exists in discussion, conversation, even one on one dialogue in the current climate and the seemingly more frequent fall into the truth, the whole truth, the partial truth, the alternate truth, and, in fact, nothing even remotely close to the actual truth, it becomes useful to keep the wordplay minimalist.

So, let's do that.

Donald Trump is a liar.

He lies daily, if not hourly, he lies on any and all subjects, he lies on any and all details remotely associated with any and all subjects, he lies about Obamacare, he lies, you get a wall, oh, where?, he lies about a porn star pay, he lies each minute of the day, he lies when he gets in a jam, he'd lie about green eggs and ham.

But, Seuessian satire aside, there's a far deeper cancer alive and growing in the lymph nodes and brain cells of the body American.

He lies without accountability.
He lies without consequence.
He lies without retribution.
He lies without being held responsible for the lies he tells.

And, in far too many mouths, from sea to shining sea, these four words come spewing forth as though they were the no fault rationalization for every single word of deceit, dishonesty, disrespect, denigration and destructive demagoguery that Donald spews, taunts and tweets with each ticking of the countdown to the next election day clock.

"Politicians...they all do it."

Oh.
Okay.
Well, then, we just need to go about our business.
And pay no attention to the hourly words of deceit, dishonesty, disrespect, denigration and destructive demagoguery being spewed, taunted and tweeted by the President of the United States.

You know what?
Scratch that.
And you know what else?
If you were nodding your head just now when I said we just need to go about our business?
Fuck you.

Because your enabling this liar is, bet the bar exam I could easily get a jury to convict you and lock you up, committing the crime of accessory after the fact in all of his lies.

And for that, you get no pass.
You get no slack.
You get no "oh, well, I guess you're entitled to your opinion."

Here's what you get.
Nothing.
And if those of us who still understand and accept the difference between opinion and fact, sentiment and fact, theory and fact...and belief and fact can find a way, we'll do everything we can to see that you never get to vote for anything ever again.

Because saying "everybody does it" makes you, at the very least, irresponsible.
And that makes you reckless.
And that makes you dangerous.

As dangerous as jumping off a bridge.

You know, the way your mama used to give you that verbal smack up side the head?

"Well, now, if Johnny jumped off a bridge, would you jump, too?

A beyond stupid thing to do.

A beyond stupid thing to do that has somehow become a way of life these days.

And here's the really stupid part....

Apparently, it has something to do with this con some guy is pulling.

Some guy who has a whole lot of really not all that bright people conned into believing that it's part of what's involved in making America great.

Wouldn't your mother be proud of you for falling for something that ridiculous?

Assuming, of course, your mother doesn't own a red cap.

Oh....and, by the way, as to my harsh language and admittedly insulting comments there a minute or so ago.

An apology is called for.

Not gonna happen.

Allow me to explain where that language and attitude comes from.

"Anti Trump-sters.....we all do it."

"Not So Much Death, As Opposed To Adjustment, Of A Salesman..."

Schools in the news almost daily.

Okay. Hold on.

Before you let loose with your DefCon 1 siren alerting the tribe to yet another libtard, snowflake assault on your assault rights, holster that smoke wagon and listen before you lock and load for a change.

Schools are, of course, in the news almost daily because of the almost daily shootings in school.

But that's not the point of this piece. And by piece, of course, I'm not referring to any heat I may or may not be packin'.

The point of the piece is that schools should be in the news almost daily.

If, for no other reason, the incredible irony that is enveloping the hallowed halls like pea soup fog on an average London day. Or a soon to once again be average San Francisco, LA and/or New York day thanks to the EPA, for the most part, being pretty much tweeted into extinction.  

And here's the irony.

America got schools. America got a lotta schools.

And America be gettin' dumber with each passing day.

And in what ways of dumbness to which I am referring?

Well, first of all, what little actual verbal language occurs anymore, for the most part replaced with tapped out texts, has a grammatical flavor that reminds one not so much of the great orators of our history but, actually, a whole lot like Yoda.

Communication, it was once, now, almost comically offered, is key.

If that's the case, we need pray for the imminent invention of a retina scan version of trying to understand each other.

Because the key, kids, is kaput.

But, I digress. Or, as, I'm willing to bet you, a whole lotta 'Muricans would be inclined to express it...I digest.

As opposed to a blanket indictment of education and/or, most especially, the lack of it in this once upon a time best educated nation on the planet, indulge me while I offer up some clarity on the confusion resulting in the incorrect interchange of two commonly known words.


Hustle...and traitor.

First, let's get a quick,cut and paste look at simple dictionary def's for the duo.


Hustle.

noun

a fraud or swindle.

Traitor.

noun

a person who betrays a friend, country, principle, etc.

At first glance, one might feel a flush of curiosity as to how two words, seemingly so unlike one another in terms of definition, could ever come close to being confused with one another.

Well, there is that America be gettin' dumber with each passing day thing.

But, turns out, it ain't so much about dumb.

Innocence, a certain naivete', perhaps and, most assuredly, a generous glob of gullibility.

But, dumb? Not duh reason.

Here's the easiest, and most currently relatable, way to paint the picture for you so as to illustrate the issue.

Among the many descriptive, denigrating and/or dramatic adjectives that have been used, of late, to label Donald Trump, none is quite so dramatic and/or denigrating as the T word, the Big T, he's Trump and that ends in P and that rhymes with T and that stands for....traitor.

Russia. Putin. Election hacking. You know the plot. This mini series is over two years old.

Now Mr. Back In The U.S.S.A is calling to congratulate Vladimir on winning a joke of an election. (Something that, in fairness, we now have in common with our Kissin Cousin Comrades) despite the loud, obvious and, well, hell, just plain good old fashioned common sense warnings coming from pretty much everybody on the planet Earth, of an official or unofficial capacity, with a functioning brain in their head except Donald Trump and most of Fox News.

But I repeat myself.

The accusations, and the theories, about what Trump is up to, why, where, when and what it all means both here in America and back in the U.S., back in the U.S, back in the U.S.S.R are as plentiful as they are imaginative.

There is one theory, though, that hasn't gotten a lot of, if any, notice, has no particular snap, crackle or pop in terms of either global ramifications and, frankly, when it comes to theatrical value it just doesn't have the kind of sexy, part spy, part porn star pumpin', part pussy grabbin', part cyberbullyin', part neo-Nazi supportin', part red cap wearin' Nuremberg meets WWE match meets Hee Haw episode praise and worhip rally flavor that we've come to expect from this 46th Presidency of the United States of America.

Yes, MAGAotts, Trump is 45. One guy was elected two different times and it counts as two different presidencies. Put down your Kool Aid, mute the sound on Hannity and crack a history book for once in your redneck, white and blue life.

Back to the traitor.

Personally, not buying it.

Don't misunderstand me. I'm not defending the guy. And the current and, ultimately, end results of what he's doing may very likely end up with him joining Benedict Arnold and the Rosenbergs in the annals of America's least likely to be revered.

But there's something Donald lacks that I feel confident is pretty much a pre-requisite when it comes to masterminding a treason of this proportion.

A master mind.

Donald Trump, meanwhile, may be one of the dumbest men to, not only, ever occupy the Oval Office, but, in fact, may be one of the dumbest men.

That's not a typo. There's nothing missing after the word "men" in that sentence.

Meanwhile, hustle?

Well, that's a swindle of a different shade.

There's no particular intelligence requirement, per se', necessary to play on people's fears, weaknesses, gullibilities, ignorances, hopes, dreams, wishes and/or hungers.

Don't need to be Stephen Hawking to know that if you can convince a room full of starving people that you've got a five course meal just waitin' for em down the street and around the corner, they'll follow you down that street, around that corner and right over the edge of the ravine before they realize that there ain't no meal and there ain't no soft landing down at the bottom of that ravine.

The "con" is as old as the garden.

The more evangelical in our midst will be very "talk to the hand"y about this, but there's no gettin' around the fact that the very first master con pulled off may very have involved the serpent and his little schpiel directed at a fresh young face name of Eve.

Truth be told, politics, by its nature, is a con, of sorts. To a degree. To a point. Out of necessity.

You can't get elected to shit in this country by being totally honest about everything.

Because if you need ten votes to win, you can't afford to piss any more than four people off.

And that means telling some lies.

Or, at least, conning those four people until after the votes are counted.

Which will bring us back to do-re-me thinks Trump is no traitor.

Or, more accurately, betraying his country is his primary motivation and/or goal.

It's really not that dramatic.

And it's really not the complicated.

Here's that one theory I alluded to earlier, that one, not mentioned, possible explanation for why Trump and Putin's song seems to be "my sweet embraceable you".

Trump never wanted to be President.

He never expected to win the election.

He's doing what he can to make hay, stock up and cash in while the making, stocking and cashing is good.

And he fully expects to walk out of the White House, be it in two years or six, and pick up where he left off, wheeling, dealing, scamming, conning and having big ass buildings constructed with his name in twenty foot high letters attached where absolutely no sight line is blocked.

Before he stiffs the contractors, screws over the associates and golf carts his way over to the drive thru window at the bankruptcy court.

Russia, like any other country, is a potential field in which Trump can plant his crops..

Think of Donald thinking of Russia as a five star restaurant of infinite culinary delights. 

Old saying. You don't shit where you eat.

Donald isn't selling American secrets to the Russians. He's not even selling America to the Russians.

He's selling Trump to the Russians.

That's Russians spelled P U T I N.

Because, hey, this annoying, and unexpected, temporary gig at 1600 Pennsylvania is preventing him from being in full blown hustle mode.

But it's not preventing him much.

And it won't be preventing him forever.

So, those who, passionately, angrily, even understandably, start hollering the word "traitor" in any sentence that includes or involves the words Donald Trump need to be aware that their passions and angers are, again, understandable, but their use of the word "traitor" is, to an extent, incorrect.

And the word you're looking for is hustler.

There is, of course, the inevitable, knee jerk response to this theory, something along the lines of "it's simply not possible that anyone could be so stupid as to believe that he could get away with committing treason for no other reason than to insure that there will be a Trump International Hotel and Country Club Red Square Edition sometime around, say, 2021."

To that, I can only offer you this.

It is, in fact, absolutely possible.

Because Donald Trump shows every sign of being one of the dumbest men.

That's not a typo, either.

 





 

 

"It's Time To Put Both A, and The, Stop To All Of This Gun Business"

And, now, a word about guns.

Stop.

Before, though, you either vigorously nod your head and raise your fist in passionate agreement or passionately shake you head and raise your fist so as to give us a clear view of your oft mentioned cold, someday dead, fingers, hear me out regarding that word about guns.

Stop.

Let's stop arguing with each other. Let's stop smacking the same worn out birdie of bang bang bang back and forth at each other across the net that serves as the metaphorical line between laying down arms and locking and loading. Let's stop lowering our standards while raising our voices and screaming at each other, determined to yell louder and be heard more clearly and finally change your mind before you change my mind, let's just make up our minds to once and for all and forever.....

Stop.

Stop discussing.
Stop debating.
Stop debasing.
Stop denigrating.
Just.
Stop.

If you are one of those seeking workable solutions to the epidemic of gun violence and death in this country, stop blasting away at those who oppose you.

Hmm. Blasting away.

Remarkable how many gun metaphors seem to fit so easily and readily into our every day vocabulary, isn't it.

If, on the other hand, you are one of those who are determined to be unmoved, unswayed and/or unwilling to hear any other point of view, opinion, perspective, possibility or plot that plays out with any other language but the hallowed, traditional collection of words that make up the 2nd Amendment of the Constitution of the United States, then stop firing back at those who oppose you.

Hmmm. Firing back.

Okay.
Back to the point.
And the word.
Stop.

Meanwhile, the remainder of this sharing is directed at those who all into the aforementioned unmoved, unswayed, unwilling to hear any other point of view, opinion, perspective, possibility or plot that plays out with any other language but the hallowed, traditional collection of words that make up the 2nd Amendment of the Constitution of the United States

And before you get all defensive, feeling put upon and persecuted, be aware that I'm in your corner. 

In a manner of speaking, to a point, with one condition.

Turns out that I'm not the only one who is prepared to advocate on your behalf. Australian humorist Jim Jeffries is right here with me, behind you.

In a manner of speaking, to a point, with one condition.

"..... I am all for your Second Amendment rights. I think you should be able to have guns. It’s in your constitution. What I am not for is bullshit arguments and lies. There is one argument and one argument alone for having a gun, and this is the argument… “Fuck off. I like guns.” It’s not the best argument, but it’s all you’ve got. And there’s nothing wrong with it. There’s nothing wrong with saying, “I like something. Don’t take it away from me.” But don’t give me this other bullshit...."  

The complete piece Jeffries wrote and performs is readily available on line, just Google him and/or Australia gun routine. If you're the workable solution seeker type, you owe it to yourself to give it a listen. It's thoughtful, insightful and very funny.

And if you're one of the unmoved and unswayed, you owe it to yourself to give it a listen. Because it's thoughtful, insightful and very funny.

Not that that matters a hoot in hell to you because chances are you're not all that inclined to see any humor, let alone the humor, in anything having to do with your right to bear arms.

So, let's just say that you owe it to me...and folks like me....to give it a listen, pay close attention to what Jeffries says and be ready to offer a little something to me and mine in return for our support of your continued "right" to own whatever you want, as many as you want, whenever you want, anytime you want, to do with as you damn well please.

And that little something.....is to stop.

Stop trying to make unlimited ownership of, and access to, any and all guns at any and all times, out to be something patriotic, along the lines of that being given liberty or being death chestnut.

Because there's nothing at all patriotic about the level of infantile selfishness that's involved when someone's sole thought is that, come hell or high water, they will be allowed to own whatever they want whenever they want. Even if children are being murdered in cold blood in their classrooms and school hallways.

Stop trying to come off like some kind of Constitutional expert, offering your irrefutable interpretation of what the framers of that document precisely intended when they worded the 2nd Amendment. There are, literally, tens of thousands of actual, highly educated, credentialed scholars, officially certified to offer expert opinion on the matter and even they cannot come to enough of a consensus to settle the matter once and for all. That leaves you and your bumper sticker/red cap authorized membership leaving a lot, oh, hell, leaving everything, to be desired when it comes to mouthing off about it.

Stop saying really stupid things like "for protection" or "for hunting" or, even, "just for pleasure and recreation" when it comes to a really lame, not to mention insulting, attempt to justify needing to own weapons whose sole reason for existing is to kill as many people as possible in as little time as necessary.

While we're at it, stop saying "need" and start using the accurate, honest word.

"Want".

You want guns.
You enjoy guns.
You get a kick out of guns.
You get off on guns.

Or as a thoughtful, insightful very funny Australian eloquently expressed it....

"...There’s nothing wrong with saying, “I like something. Don’t take it away from me.”

Yeah. What he said. 

Oh...and this.... 

"...But don’t give me this other bullshit...."  

Yeah. What he said, there, too.

We know it's bullshit.

You know it's bullshit.

Just.

Stop.

What's A Few Loose Screws As Long As The Magazine Is Secure..."

Here's the only absolutely sure thing about any discussion of guns in this country.

At some point, discussion of guns simply becomes too exhausting to continue.

It's a lot like divorce.

If you're the one divorcing, then you know how the argument or arguments get to the point where it's an exercise in futility to continue. Every time you say up , they say down, every time they say white, you say black, every time either one of you says anything, the other one of you says the other thing and it goes back and forth and back and forth and back and forth....until you simply just don't fucking care anymore.

And if you're the one growing up in the midst of a divorce, you simply, and much more quickly, get to the point where you simply want mommy and daddy to shut the fuck up and stop fighting.

The key difference, of course, is that when the dust settles on the bickering, there are no school kids lying dead on cold tile floors in hallways and classrooms. No blood slowly trickling under desks and lockers. No sounds of screams and sirens and weeping and moaning in a space where the only sounds obvious should be the ringing of bells signaling the end of class or a chorus of voices talking about homework or after school events or what's for lunch or teenage love affairs in a mixture of sound that almost reminds one of a symphony warming up before a concert. No particular melody obvious to the naked ear, a cacophony that seemingly makes no sense at all, yet, is interesting, even comforting.

In recent weeks, both in print, here on this podcast and on air as I've guest hosted on talk radio, I've quoted, a number of times and in a number of contexts, a line of dialogue cleverly delivered by the late John Mahoney, who played Martin Crane, the down to earth dad of Niles and Frasier Crane in the popular sitcom "Frasier". At some point or another, in one of Frasier's trademark erudite, verbose rants about this social injustice or that etiquette faux pas, Marty Crane, with the wisdom of the ages, lovingly, but almost wearily offers to his son, "life isn't complicated, Frasier...you just make it that way."

For all of the emotional, psychological, physiological, rhetorical, political, sociological, philosophical, even spiritual shades of gray that find their way into the swirl of 2nd Amendment soup, Marty Crane's observation seems both trenchant and on target. So to speak.

The issue of guns in this country isn't complicated. Americans just make it that way.

Because the issue of guns in this country is the mother of all things guaranteed to send mommy and daddy into full blown bitch and bicker, fuck me, no, fuck you, Katy, bar the door back and forth and back and forth and back and forth and back...and forth....until exhaustion arrives, almost like a rescuer. Ending the circular madness of the confrontation.

But ending only the madness of the confrontation. Not the madness itself.

The first dictionary I consulted offered up three definitions of the word madness.

A state of frenzied or chaotic activity.

Extremely foolish behavior.

The state of being mentally ill, especially severely.

And as regards the madness America sloppily, even embarrassingly tries to disguise as "debate" about the right to bear arms?

Check, check and check on those three definitions.

Frenzied or chaotic activity?

Log on to any social media site. Turn on any news station. Tune in, call in, join in the galactic sized gathering of Rhodes Scholars, legal and constitutional experts and love it or leave it patriotic defenders of the red, white and blue that make up talk radio these days.

We got yer frenzied or chaotic activity.

Extremely foolish behavior?

Uh, yeah. Again, log on, turn on, tune in.

"I can have any goddamn gun I want, as many goddamn guns as I want, any and every goddamn time I want because the goddamn 2nd Amendment says so........"

"...alrighty, then. Let's go to our next caller."

 And then, there's that little matter of the state of being mentally ill, especially severely.

17 dead kids lying on the cold tile floors of hallways and classrooms in Parkland, Florida. Shot to death by a teenager who got the key to daddy's obviously useless gun safe and pulled out the trusty AR-15 to take out his misery and frustration on 17 dead kids lying on the cold tile.....

...well, you get the idea.

Stop me if you've heard this one before.

It's not a gun issue. It's a mental health issue.

You know what?

Goddamn right it's a mental health issue.

How crazy do you have to be to think that your "right" to have access to or own whatever weapon you want, as many as you want, whenever you want is more important, EVER, for a single goddamn second that the "right" of a kid to go to school and not end up lying dead on the cold tile floor of a hallway or classroom?

Goddamn right it's a mental health issue.

How crazy do you have to be to not only say, but actually believe, mindlessly moronic things like "well, some guy in China knifed 33 people to death so let's ban knives, too. In fact, I could stab you with a salad fork, so let's ban salad forks too." Love of God, man, do you actually hear yourself when you say staggeringly stupid shit like that?

And if one more person even begins the sentence that starts with "drunk drivers" and ends with "let's ban cars", swear to God, I'm coming after you and your family with a salad fork.

Help me to help you. What is it you don't get about how one has nothing to do with the other? That saying staggeringly stupid shit like "well, if they didn't have a gun, they'd just use a knife" is exactly the same thing as saying "well, if he didn't beat his wife with a baseball bat, he's just beat his wife with his fists" instead of saying "for the ever loving love of Christ, we have got to do whatever it takes....whatever it takes......to keep this guy from beating his wife."

How crazy do you have to be not to see that?

Goddamn right it's a mental health issue.

How crazy do you have to be to be saying anything...anything....other than "what can I do, how I can I help, what's reasonable and practical and, simply, do-able to, at the very least, lessen the chances that even one more kid will end up dead on the cold tile floor of a hallway or classroom, blood slowly trickling under desks and lockers...the sounds of screams and sirens and weeping and moaning in a space where the only sounds obvious should be the ringing of bells signaling the end of class or a chorus of voices talking about homework or after school events or what's for lunch or teenage love affairs...?"

All kinds of mental illness in life, you know.

Here's a top ten list compiled by mental health professionals.

1) Major Depressive Disorder (include dysthymia, seasonal affective disorders)
2) Generalized Anxiety/Panic disorder (include other anxiety disorders such as social anxiety)
3) Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder
4) Bipolar disorder (include cyclothymia and bipolar I and II
5) Schizophrenia and Schizoaffective disorders
6) Dissociation and Multiple Personality disorders
7) Other personality disorders such as Borderline Personality
8) ADD/ADHD
9) Insomnia
10) Addiction
11) Eating Disorders (include Anorexia, Bulimia, and not otherwise specified)
12) Post Traumatic Stress Disorder
13) Dementia
14) Autism


Let's take a quick look at those through the red, white and blue colored glasses of those laser focused loyal to the 2nd Amendment patriots.

Major depressive disorder....what? I can't have as many of whatever whenever I want? bummer, man...and, oh, yeah, no fucking way, snowflake.

Generalized anxiety...I gotta have guns...I gotta have more guns....I gotta have all guns....they're gonna take my guns....they're gonna keep me from having guns, more guns, all guns.....this is so nerve wracking....and, oh, yeah, no fucking way, snowflake.

Obsessive-compulsive disorder...gotta have, gotta have more, gotta have all....

Bi polar disorder....guns make me feel ten feet tall, twelve inches long and eight miles high....the thought of no guns makes me feel like life isn't worth living...

Schizophrenia...I keep hearing voices....telling me they're coming to take my guns....oh...wait....I was watching Will and Grace....who put on Fox News?

Multiple personality disorders...having all these guns makes me feel like Jesse James and Lucas McCain and Patton and Leroy Jethro Gibbs and ...and.....

ADD/ADHD...so, you're saying that we can still own guns and, at the same time, make it less likely that kids will be shot to de....wait.....is that Hannity?.....make it less likely that kids will be....wait?....is that an ATF truck pulling up outside?

Insomnia....they're going to take my guns, can't sleep, they're going to take my guns, can't sleep...

PTSD...I still get all clammy and shaky when I think how my dad gave me that BB gun but made me give up the AR-15....

Dementia....I'm crazy about guns.....guns are my friend.....guns will protect me and my family, uh, yeah, that, too, sure....but it's just good to have them....they make me feel manly....and safe....and....wait...what is that? is that firecrackers?........wait.....is there a fire....where are those sirens going......where is that weeping sound coming from................why.........are things......so quiet all of a sudden.

Yeah.

It's not a gun issue.

It's a mental health issue.

Goddamn right it is.

Can't Stand Much More Of America Being Made Great Again

Let's see…a 71 year old white man from Selma, Alabama named Jefferson Beauregard Sessions seems to imply, in a speech, that law enforcement should be primarily white and there's shock and disbelief. Up next: a nation stunned as a leopard reveals its spots..

Coal workers still not being provided the jobs that were promised, take heart.... starting to look like each and every one of you will have a shot at being either WH Chief of Staff or director of the FBI sooner or later......

#whatthehellmaybeevenfirstlady

…interesting insight in a JFK bio I'm going through researching another book.....

".... Kennedy understood that it was the people in a country that mattered. Governments come and go, but the people of a country are its heart and soul and mind and showing them dignity and respect and concern makes all the difference when it comes to being respected in return. It was that wisdom that made him globally appreciated and respected and accounts for the massive outpouring of both affection and grief that occurred all over the world when he was assassinated."

Donald could benefit from taking a few minutes to read this particular bio......you know, if he ever read anything......or, you know, if he could actually read......

66 programs to be eliminated in the proposed Trump budget...trimming waste is one thing...arbitrarily shutting down beneficial programs out of pettiness and/or spite is another....and....since Trump doesn't read anything that's not on a teleprompter or the Fox News Chiron, one wonders who put this list together.....President Bannon or President Kelly...wait, President Kushner.....no.....President Kellyanne.......pick a prez, any prez.....

Trump's budget includes a plan for privatizing the space station...good news is that shuttle flights will resume...it will take five, at least, to haul the giant T R U M P letters up there for the install....

Today's Fun American Street Riddle....

...how do you get to the high road via Pennsylvania Ave?

...bwahahaha.... trick question......there's no high road anywhere near Pennsylvania Ave.

The plan is to get rid of food stamps and replace it with food “kits”…once again....a system designed by geniuses...being "improved" by idiots......the point, that there are abuses of the food stamp program, is valid....

instead of closing loopholes and increasing accountability via high tech methods currently available, though, the "solution" is to

1) deny those with a genuine need, as in punishing the innocent because it's easier (and less profitable) than shutting off the guilty.....

2) ask people to rely on a delivery system created and to be coordinated by an administration that is both globally known and admired for its efficiency..#sarcasm .what about misshipments? what about delayed shipments? what about lost shipments? what about spoiled food? what about a returns policy..(Ivanka, Jared and Tweedle Eric and Tweedle Junior have to do six months, minimum, on the customer service hotline) ...oh, yeah, this is marvelous....what could possibly go wrong? #sarcasm

3) guarantee that every person involved in the assembly and distribution of these "kits" will make a fortune.....starting with the corner grocer whose first new location is 1600 Pennsylvania Ave...#trumpsteaksineverykitbetthefarm

4) dick around and spend God knows how much for days, weeks or months trying to get a program doomed to fail from the get go up and running that has less of a chance of lifting off than a space shuttle filled with contestants from The Biggest Loser.

5) NEW RULE: any new program or adjustment to an existing program that affects people's material or physical needs must be "beta tested" for 90 days by, at least, ten members of each party in the Senate, the House of Reps and the corner grocer at 1600 Pennsylvania Ave.

yo, Herman....and your buddy, there......you guys think the women's marches filled the streets with pissed off people? wait till you get a load of tens of thousands of hungry people.......

stop pandering to the "base".
fix the goddamn existing system.

And now…Parkland, Florida…

OBVIOUS SOLUTION #54....insist that your Congressperson and Senator vote to make the NRA a Federal Agency......Trump will cut off funding and dismantle the damn thing in 48 hours or less.....

…if it was 17 dead bodies lying on the floor of the United States Senate or the House of Representatives, the "Comprehensive Legislation to Insure Protection" (C.L.I.P) would be created, presented, voted on, passed and on Trump's desk for signature by EOB today......

PARTING THOUGHT…Those who immediately respond that guns are not the problem in this country are absolutely correct…

The problem in this country is the attitude about guns…

All you want as many as you want whenever you want for whatever you want…

That selfishness, not the gun, is what is killing our children…

Continue that selfishness.

Protect the children.

Pick one.

You can’t have both.

Yes, There's Black And There's White...But I'll Be The One Telling You Which One Is Which...

Too many of the major news outlets and almost all talk radio is, at best, missing a valuable opportunity and, at worst, just adding fuel to an already raging fire

Little thing called “preaching to the choir”.

Nobody is always right or always wrong about everything all the time. Not the left. And not the right. And not the moderates, Libertarians, Rotarians, Vegetarians, or magna cum laude graduates of Hogwarts…… And without the informed, reasonable, articulate dissenting opinion, this country would have driven off the cliff and exploded into a billion fiery pieces decades and decades ago.

The only reason that hasn’t happened yet is we go through this yank to the left yank to the right yank to the left yank to the right Benny Hill Driving School comedy routine on an every four or eight-year basis and because we back and forth we can’t quite MAKE it to the edge…but …guess what?

We don’t get anywhere, either…we just yank and bicker and bitch and argue and either weave around like idiots or we travel in circles.

First, there’s “confirmation bias”…the phenomenon that dictates our refusal to even hear, let alone consider, ANY opinion, point of view l let alone fact, that doesn’t merely back up whatever we believe or want to believe in the first place…..then, there’s arrogance…the attitude that, we’re America, fuck you…..what do you mean we need to improve….fuck you….what do you mean we aren’t perfect, fuck you…we’re America….….then, of course, pride…the garden variety that goes before the fall…..add selfishness, the character kink that says we want what we want as much as we want of whatever we want any and every damn time we want it because, fuck you, we’re America….and you know what? Those destructive and defeating parts of our humanness have been around since the Garden…….the only reason they’re suddenly more obvious than usual these days is the “flamboyance” of someone like Donald Trump who, set aside any and all policy disagreements we might have with him, has made rudeness and crudeness and arrogance and selfishness not only acceptable, but pretty much fashionable….Make America Great Again…..scratch just a little under that mantra and you’ll read the real message….fuck you, we’re America……

Earlier this week, I guest hosted on talk radio…. on the morning after the State of the Union speech, I opened both the phone lines and the can of worms that comes with any “so what are your thoughts” when it comes to any and all things Trump these days.  I personally sat out of the back and forth, offering no personal opinion, merely moderating or, more accurately, acting as the goalie…when the puck flew too close to the fire, I kicked it back into play…did it on purpose…so that I could concentrate on hearing and reading the texts that were also a part of the conversation….and with allowances for a few comments about “well, I liked the speech” or “he sounded good, hope he lives up to the promises”, most of what was said and what was heard on this very air was bashing the Democrats for not applauding, for wearing black, for having red hair and drooling and on and on and on…….

And don’t think for a second that the Republicans are always the bad guys….if Hillary had taken the oath in Jan and the GOP had given Hillary the symbolic finger last night, the phones would have been burning with Democrats up in arms about why their girl wasn’t being praised and adored and respected….and…and….it’s ENOUGH ALREADY…..a pox on both your houses….but better yet, how about a pox on neither house?

Even better yet, how about no damn poxes at all? How about you try to, at the very least, stop throwing out the good with the bath water and find something the party you oppose has to offer that isn’t demonic or Satanic and destined to take us all into the fiery depths of extinction….no matter which party you belong to and which party that party you oppose.

Because NOBODY is ALL WRONG OR ALL RIGHT ALL THE TIME……Now, if you can’t do that because you truly believe the other guys have nothing to offer but the fiery depths of extinction, then we can all just stop worrying….because if that’s true, we got bigger problems than we can every hope to overcome, so we may as well just kick back, enjoy the Super Bowl this weekend and hug our kids while we wait for the end to come.

And THAT’S what you should be hearing from most of the major news outlets and almost ALL of talk radio……. but you’re not…and you won’t…. because that’s not what preaching to the choir sounds like….

Real, honest, god given true leadership is really hard…because sometimes it means going against the grain…against the flow…against the current…it means knowing exactly what it is you want to hear and knowing that if I tell you that, you’re gonna love me and praise me and vote for me no matter what kind of a scum ball human being I might be…..but instead of telling you what you want to hear, inciting you and lowering the bar of behavior, I try instead to inspire you…..tricky business knowing the difference between being inspired and being incited……not a lot of people know how to tell…and NONE of us can really tell ALL the time whether it’s one or the other……

But when a news show host or a talk radio host tells you, yeah, those Democrats are a bunch of losers because they didn’t show Donald Trump the respect he deserves, that’s not trying to get you to see things from both sides and make an honest evaluation….that’s trying to stir the pot that’s already boilin’…so that you’ll feel like talk radio has your back, baby…..and it makes for good ratings….at least it makes for people who already feel that way to tune in…..but it’s not really doing much good or making things any better or even beginning to be a part of looking for solutions…..it’s just preaching to the choir…..and I’m pretty sure that not a lot is accomplished by getting people who are already in the pews all worked up about being in the pews…..when there’s so many people wandering around outside who might think at least a little about coming in and having a seat….if only someone would take the time and make the effort to inspire them…instead of inciting them.

But that’s what gets you elected to the Presidency now…. inciting the voters as opposed to inspiring them….and stirring hearts and minds has been harshly replaced with stirring up the shit pot of anger and resentment and hatred and bigotry….

TV news talk….and talk radio? Well they’re mostly just worm can opening and shit pot stirring and feeding the fire that already burns too hot…. flames so high that sometimes you think they might reach all the way to heaven….but then, you already know that don’t you….and my telling you all of this…is just preaching to the choir….

Three Words... For The Win.....

Over the course of the last twelve months, one simple three word phrase has made its way to the top ten of the American lexicon.

You may actually, though, not be aware of its prominence.

Which is simultaneously paradoxical, humorous and more than just a smidge ironic because you have almost certainly heard the phrase used, if not used the phrase yourself, at some time at least once a day.

Minimum.

And, if not the phrase itself, then most assuredly you have heard, or used, some variation, euphemism and/or expression that more than covers the primary spirit intended by use of the original.

Ladies and gentlemen, racing its way up the charts and soon to over take such three word chestnuts as OMG, what the fuck?, who's on first, you da man, never look back and even I love you, we offer the soon to be number one three word phrase of the era history will both hilariously and tragically revisit some day as the age of Donald....

"But...what about...?"

This trilogy of testimony on behalf of a particular attitude or point of view or even behavior has come into fashion primarily on the same tsunami of passion and emotion that swept the Donald into his temporary tenure as America's director of temper tantrum.

And, of course, is used prolifically and unfailingly by those who still, one year into the Dante meets Benny Hill meets Chrisley Knows Best sitcom/reality show mutant that is this presidency, feel the need, desire and/or intention of defending the pretty much daily output of surreal nonsense issued from a roundish sort of office on Pennsylvania Ave. that used to be good for at least the occasional sprinkling of inspiration, motivation or...wait for it....good old fashioned American savvy and know how.

Yeah. America has totally hit the pause button on that shit, to be sure.

But, what about..."but, what about...?"

The most recent display, at this writing, of course, because, again, usage is now measured on a daily, if not hourly, basis, came as the result of Donald's reassurances to that portion of the electorate that isn't still having family portraits done at Olan Mills wearing their red MAGA caps, that he is in full possession of his faculties. A concern that said portion of the electorate, let's round down and say 80 million Americans, give or take, have had all along, most recently with the publishing of the first of what will be more tell all books than you can shake your Dewey Decimal at, Fire and Fury.

Donald's tweet du jour apparently meant to reassure went something like this:


...actually, throughout my life, my two greatest assets have been mental stability and being, like, really smart. Crooked Hillary Clinton also played these cards very hard and, as everyone knows, went down in flames. I went from VERY successful businessman to top TV star to President of the United States (on my first try). I think that would qualify as not smart, but genius...and a very stable genius at that.


Okay.

Let's skip the armchair Freudian interpretations and amateur attempts at psychobabble in dissecting what is to any first year psych student a textbook example of infantile narcissism and cut to the three word chase.

But...what about?.

Upon enjoying a chortle or two at Donald's latest "see me, feel me, need me, love me" twittering there, I, in a newly committed spirit of looking for the humor in all of this, posted this observation on Facebook.

"...here's the thing...when you vote for a cartoon character...and it gets elected...you can't blame the rest of us for laughing at the cartoon..."

The responses, for the most part, were commiserating, grammatical nods of the head in one form or another.

The key phrase in that sentence, of course, being "for the most part".

Because it took almost no time at all before a meme was posted taking a predictable, and, frankly, pretty unoriginal pot shot at Barack Obama.

Qualifying it, of course, as usage of the three word oration that's sweeping the nation.

In this case, mapped out for those who need a little mapping out of these kinds of things, it would read like this:

Donald Trump tweeted, once again, like a five year old about how smart and stable he is, giving those who are concerned about his intelligence and stability all the proof that they need that he is neither smart nor stable.....but what about when Barack Obama messed up on that healthcare thing, huh? what about that? Huh?

Uh, yeah.

You know what?

The temptation from this side of the ideology line would be to take a swing at sending that bombastic birdie back over the net.

But, truth be told, those of us with a relatively functioning oblongata are pretty much tired of playing.

And, yes, its only been a year of what is theoretically going to be four years, but, again, you know what?

We're just tired of playing.

So, let's try this approach in this new year.

First, if all you've got when your boy is critiqued for his flamboyant flaws and failings is a candy ass attempt to fill in the blank at the end of the phrase "but...what about...", then do us both, and all, a favor and save your breath. Or your typing fingers. Or whatever you use to peck out your pointless prattle.

Because we don't want to play anymore.

Time for the grown ups to get back to work finding and supporting someone who will restore the office of the Presidency of the United States to its rightful owner.

Another grown up.

But, by way of helping out our fellow grown ups who are tired of your silly "but what about-ing", here's a 128 word phrase that they are free to use, cut and paste, post as audio, do whatever you like to save them the time and trouble, and freeing them of the temptation, of taking a swipe at that birdie the next time you send it over the net.

Cause we all know there will be a next time. And a next. And a next.

Here you go.....

"But what about? But WHAT about?.....you know what? YES, Bill Clinton got blowjobs from Monica Lewinsky...YES, Ronald Reagan funded the Contras...YES, Richard Nixon tried to cover up Watergate...YES, Lyndon Johnson fucked up spectacularly when it came to Vietnam policy...YES, JFK totally blew it with the Bay Of Pigs....YES,  Warren G Harding's presidency was filled with kickbacks and scandals...YES, Grover Cleveland fathered an illegitimate child...YES, Andrew Jackson supported an adulterer in his Cabinet...YES, Thomas Jefferson fathered children with one of his own slaves....but NONE of that....absolutely NONE of that has ANYTHING to do with or ALTERS, for a second, THE FACT that Donald Trump is an incompetent, infantile narcissistic sociopathic man child, unfit, incapable and unqualified to be President of the United States....NONE of it. NOTHING. Zip. Zero. Nada."

We got yer birdie.

Set.

Game.

Match.